Trauma Therapist: Why We Self-Sabotage
Trauma Therapist: Why We Self-Sabotage
Written by: Lauran Hahn, LMHC
Do you find yourself stuck in a cycle of getting in your way? You're heading in the right direction and all of a sudden, boom, you kick yourself right off your path. This can look like working hard towards a promotion, only to miss an important deadline because you procrastinated or doubted your abilities. Or it can look like being in a healthy relationship, but focusing only on your partner’s negative traits.
At Mindful Living Counseling Orlando, we help people stop sabotaging their own efforts so they realize their deepest desires. We help them heal past wounds and traumas so they can get out of their own way and live deeply fulfilling lives.
Why Do We Block Our Progress?
There are many reasons why we can prevent ourselves from realizing our dreams. In my opinion, all signs point to unresolved trauma.
Fear of Failure
Unresolved issues from the past can set someone up for this by instilling a deep-seated fear of repeating painful experiences. For instance, a person who was harshly criticized or punished for making mistakes during childhood might develop a fear of failure. This fear can become so overwhelming that they avoid taking risks or pursuing opportunities where failure is a possibility, effectively preventing their own progress.
Fear of Success
Conversely, fear of success can stem from past experiences where success led to increased expectations or jealousy from others. For example, someone might have achieved something significant only to face resentment or pressure from their peers or family. This can cause them to shy away from achievements to avoid potential negative repercussions, ultimately blocking their own progress.
Low Self-Esteem
Low self-esteem often roots back to early life experiences of neglect, abuse, or constant criticism. For example, someone who grew up in an environment where they were frequently told they were not good enough might internalize these messages, leading to a diminished sense of self-worth. As an adult, this can manifest as a reluctance to pursue goals or opportunities because they don't believe they are capable or deserving of success. This unresolved trauma creates a mental barrier that keeps them from striving for or achieving their full potential.
Internalized Negative Beliefs
Internalized negative beliefs are usually the result of repeated negative reinforcement during formative years. Imagine a child who constantly hears statements like "You'll never amount to anything" or "You're a failure." Over time, these statements become ingrained in their psyche, shaping their self-perception and worldview. As adults, these internalized beliefs can undermine their efforts by creating a persistent inner dialogue that questions their abilities and worth, leading to self-doubt and inaction whenever they attempt to make positive changes.
Unresolved Loss
Unresolved loss from the past can create significant emotional and mental barriers. For example, someone who has experienced a traumatic event, such as the sudden loss of a loved one, might struggle with unresolved grief. This unprocessed grief can lead to behaviors and patterns that impede their progress, such as avoiding situations that remind them of their loss or becoming overly attached to stability and routine. These behaviors can prevent them from taking the necessary steps to achieve their goals, as they are constantly trying to manage their unresolved emotions rather than focusing on their aspirations.
How EMDR Therapy Can Help with Self-Sabotage
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy is a powerful tool for addressing self-sabotage. By targeting and processing unresolved traumatic memories, EMDR helps individuals reframe negative beliefs and reduce emotional distress associated with past experiences. During EMDR sessions, clients focus on specific memories while engaging in bilateral stimulation, such as eye movements or tapping. This process facilitates the brain's natural healing mechanisms, enabling individuals to integrate traumatic memories in a healthier way. As a result, the patterns of self-sabotage linked to these unresolved traumas diminish, empowering individuals to break free from self-limiting behaviors and achieve their goals with greater confidence and clarity.
Interested in How Trauma Therapy Helps?
The therapists at Mindful Living Counseling Orlando are ready to assist you in working through trauma and any other therapy-related issues you may be facing. To get started with one of our trauma therapists:
Fill out our New Client Consultation Form
Schedule a consultation call with one of our trauma therapists.
Begin your healing journey!
Not Ready for Trauma Therapy Orlando?
We are a team of trauma therapists specializing in providing help. We understand that you may not feel ready. If you would like to learn more about trauma therapy, we recommend reviewing the articles below.
Trauma Therapy Orlando Resources
Emotional Blueprint: Understanding Our Emotional Responses
Types of Counseling: Trauma Counseling
Understanding the Fawn Response
Overcoming Performance Anxiety with EMDR Therapy
Orlando Therapist: Understanding Therapy Jargon
An Anxiety Therapist Shares Everything You Need to Know About Anxiety
Other Therapy Services Offered at Mindful Living Counseling in Orlando
At Mindful Living Counseling, we provide various therapy options, such as Anxiety Therapy, Toxic Relationships counseling, EMDR Therapy, and Teen Therapy, in addition to Guided Meditations.
Trauma Therapist Spotlight: Lauran Hahn
Lauran Hahn, LMHC, offers trauma-focused therapy in Orlando and specializes in helping with anxiety and trauma through EMDR Intensives. She is a Certified Sensorimotor Psychotherapist, a Certified EMDR Therapist, and an EMDRIA Approved Consultant.