Trauma Therapist: Signs of Childhood Trauma in Adults
Trauma Therapist: Signs of Childhood Trauma in Adults
Written by: Lauran Hahn, LMHC
Have you ever found yourself overreacting to a situation, only to wonder why your emotions seem so out of sync? Perhaps there's a nagging suspicion that your childhood holds some answers, yet when you sift through your memories, nothing stands out. You think, 'I wasn't abused,' and push the thought aside. You compare yourself to others who had ‘real trauma’ and dismiss the idea that because your parents provided a roof over your head and plenty of food to eat.
As the owner of Mindful Living Counseling in downtown Orlando, where we specialize in trauma and anxiety, I've had countless conversations with clients who initially brushed off their past because they didn't face physical abuse.
But here's something you might find surprising: childhood trauma isn’t always marked by glaringly obvious signs. Often, it’s those subtle, not-so-obvious experiences that can leave the deepest imprints on us. In this blog post, we'll explore the hidden facets of childhood trauma and how they might be influencing your life in ways you never realized.
What is Childhood Trauma And Its Effects
The definition of childhood trauma is broad and encompassing. Simply put, if an event or series of events happen that overwhelm a child’s ability to cope, we can safely say that childhood trauma occurred. Many therapists, including us at Mindful Living Counseling, use the Adverse Childhood Experiences Scale (ACES) to gain a deeper understanding of what our adult clients might have faced earlier in their lives. This helps us tailor our approach to therapy, ensuring we address those deep-seated issues effectively.
What is traumatic for one child might not affect another in the same way. Trauma is deeply personal and specific to each individual. Experiencing seemingly less dramatic events, like witnessing frequent arguments between parents, feeling a persistent coldness in their interactions, or even watching scary movies, can be just as traumatizing for some children as more overtly violent scenarios. These situations, perceived as scary or unsettling, can occur once or multiple times during childhood. However, it’s also important to recognize that not every distressing event necessarily leads to trauma for every child.
Here are some symptoms of childhood trauma that may be more dominant for people with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) resulting from such trauma:
Depression or anxiety.
May find it challenging to be warm-hearted to others
Increased aggression towards others and your environment, such as vandalism.
Sleep troubles.
Emotionally detached from people and interests.
Problems with relationships.
Self-esteem and confidence issues.
Social isolation or withdrawal from friends and family.
Heightened physical stress.
Flashbacks of the traumatic events.
Difficulty setting boundaries.
Substance Abuse.
With these signs, you will begin to see just how you or someone may have experienced trauma as a kid, even though they were not sexually or physically abused. Let's break down some types of childhood trauma events to connect the dots better.
Types of Childhood Trauma
Emotional Neglect
Childhood emotional neglect is one of the least commonly recognized forms of trauma, yet it's often a profound source of it. This type of neglect occurs when a child doesn’t receive sufficient emotional support or security from their caregiver. You might think to yourself, “I had food,” “My parents stayed married,” or “They attended my graduation and picked me up from school.” However, if they didn’t allow you to express yourself freely, if they disregarded your emotions, or if they tried to control how you felt, then you were not truly seen, heard, or validated. When caregivers consistently fail to tune into their children's emotions, preferences, or aversions, it reflects emotional misattunement. Persistent instances of this behavior can be identified as emotional neglect.
Here are more instances of emotional neglect as a child include:
Your feelings are either ignored or dismissed.
Your caregiver hesitates to show affection or withholds it overall.
Failing to acknowledge a period of grief, like losing your pet or helping the child deal with such.
You weren’t joined in your joyful moments or celebrated for your accomplishments.
As an adult, you may be a prone people-pleaser or have difficulty expressing yourself when you dealt with emotional neglect as a child.
Grief
Every child deals with the loss of someone close in their way. Most children may get over the loss of a family or friend's death. For others, it is challenging, especially when they are attached to such a person. Such death, expected, unexpected, or sudden, can be traumatic for children, especially when the child witnessed the incident. This involves terminating one's life support, resuscitation, overdoses, accidents, homicide, and suicide.
The Frontiers in Psychiatry released a study illustrating how people who lost a loved one during the 9/11 attack showed symptoms of PTSD 3 years after the event. Know that children who have gone through traumatic grief often find it difficult to remember positive memories of their deceased loved ones. They are also triggered by any touch, smell, or sound, bringing back memories of the traumatic event.
Disasters
Society for Research in Child Development reports that 175 million children globally are affected by natural disasters every year. Natural disasters such as floods, tornados, earthquakes, wildfires, or hurricanes like we have here in Orlando can be traumatic for children. Since a list of these disasters is unexpected or comes with little warning, earthquakes can be a terrifying experience for a child who finds themselves in one.
Compared to adults, children’s reactions to these events are more severe due to their biology, such as:
They breathe more relative to their size.
Their skin is less thick.
Dehydration can affect them more severely.
They lose heat more easily.
Besides struggling to navigate these events as kids, children with such experiences grow up with mental health issues as a result. Some signs include feeling sad, depression, fear about your safety, anxiety, and even losing interest in activities.
Bullying
Bullying is a deliberate and sometimes unprovoked action with one purpose: to inflict harm on children perceived to be less powerful. It could be psychological, physical, or even social harm. They often happen in 4 different known forms:
Verbal: Call them names, threaten to cause harm, and put the child down.
Physical: Poking, kicking, spitting, pushing, making offensive hand or body signals and breaking the child's things
Social: Spreading rumors or lies. Making horrible jokes and leaving the child out on purpose.
Cyberbullying: Any of the above forms of bullying happen through technology, like social media.
Bullying tends to happen frequently due to the bullies needing to continually feel better about themselves or failure to recognize their actions as the problem. In some cases, bullies have been bullied or are experiencing bullying and bully others to lash out. Bullying isn't only limited to schools, as it is often portrayed in the media. It can happen anywhere, leaving a child often being secretive, having sleep problems, and appearing oversensitive.
These children often feel ashamed, afraid, unsafe, and, in many cases, guilty, deeming their predicament their fault and needing trauma therapy to become better.
Bullying vs. Teasing
It's important to differentiate bullying from teasing, as one tends to be mistaken for the other. Bullying is repeated, often inflicted by someone with more power, and involves intimidation intending to cause harm. Teasing, on the other hand, is the complete opposite.
Verbal
Children are subjected to verbal abuse by parents or caregivers who belittle, scream, blame, and threaten them. Even sarcastic remarks from a caregiver to a child are regarded as verbal assault, as the American Society for Positive Care for Children states.
While some verbal abuse is blatantly negative, some may be hidden in the form of encouragement, like when parents are highly critical of their children. Others include frequent family discord, unpredictable responses from parents, and even conflicting messages to such children.
A 2023 study showed that verbal abuse has become the most prevalent of abuse children face in recent years, identifying parents, teachers, and mothers as the most common perpetrators. Yes, these individuals get overwhelmed and swapped with everyday stress. However, these do not deter from the fact that their actions may be deemed verbal assaults and taunt the children until their adulthood, causing emotional turmoil.
Physical Abuse
Physical abuse is any act that leads to an injury to a child or adolescent resulting from a caregiver's aggression towards the said child. It could also be when our parents go too far, lashing out punishments. These injuries could both be intentional or unintentional. So, besides apparent acts such as punching, slapping, kicking, or even breaking bones, other subtleties include shaking the child. Nationwide Children, a pediatric medical center, reports that physical abuse is the second most common form of child abuse, and 5.5 million children are involved in these cases yearly.
Physical abuse is especially devastating for children who have looked up to their caregivers for security and depend on them for their safety. This change in their needs and reality ignites the emotional turmoil that they experience even years after the traumatic event (s).
Sexual abuse
Sexual abuse is any touching or non-touching interactions between a child and an adult or another child. While touching behaviors can easily be spotted, non-touching interaction may not be. The National Child Traumatic Stress Network states that some of the latter include:
Exposing the child to pornography
Exhibitionism
Trying or looking at a child's naked body.
Children who have been sexually abused display both behavioral and emotional reactions that match symptoms from other types of childhood traumas. As adult survivors, you may experience sexual dysfunction or disturbances and, in some cases, be suicidal, needing weeks to years of trauma therapy to heal.
Next Steps
As you can now see, childhood trauma can stem from multiple events that go beyond physical or sexual abuse. While their effects overlap, it is primarily peculiar to individuals who face such.
The first step to healing is accepting them, followed by more steps to help you manage. Which includes writing down your triggers and reactions and building a self-care plan to deal with such triggers and change your reactions. This could take some time, so you must be patient. Another option is to seek help to manage the symptoms through trauma therapy. This process is easier when you have a professional to guide you.
Interested in How Trauma Therapy Helps?
If you found something relatable in this blog, please know that you don't have to face it alone. The therapists at Mindful Living Counseling Orlando are always ready to assist you in navigating stress and addressing any other therapy-related concerns you may have. To get started with one of our counselors:
Fill out our New Client Consultation Form
Schedule a consultation call with one of our anxiety therapists.
Begin your healing journey!
Not Ready for Trauma Therapy?
At Mindful Living Counseling, we have a team of specialized trauma therapists who are always ready to help. We understand that you may have some questions before making your first phone call, but rest assured that our highly trained experts will equip you with the most effective tools to overcome the anxiety that comes with getting started. If you're interested in learning more about trauma therapy, we recommend checking out the articles provided below.
Trauma Therapy Resources
Types of Counseling: Trauma Counseling
EMDR Therapy for Trauma-Related Brain Injuries
Orlando Therapist: Understanding Therapy Jargon
An Anxiety Therapist Shares Everything You Need to Know About Anxiety
5 Signs You’re Healing from Trauma
3 Uncomfortable Feelings When It Comes to Setting Boundaries
Other Therapy Services Offered at Mindful Living Counseling in Orlando
At Mindful Living Counseling, we understand that trauma can be a significant obstacle to overcome, but we also acknowledge that there may be other challenges that you may be facing. That's why we offer a wide range of therapy services, including Anxiety Therapy, Toxic Relationships, EMDR Therapy, and Teen Therapy, as well as Guided Meditations. If you have any questions or concerns, please don't hesitate to contact us.
Trauma Therapist Spotlight
Lauran Hahn, LMHC, is an Orlando trauma-based therapist who specializes in helping clients who are struggling with anxiety and trauma. Lauran also works with individuals to heal from toxic relationships. She is a Certified Sensorimotor Psychotherapist, a Certified EMDR Therapist, and an EMDRIA Approved Consultant.